Just for you Grandma Bev and Grandpa James...

Christmas Morning 2008: Recipe for a wonderful day

1. Run to 817 to look for the presents from you.

2. See the presents on the conference table.

3. Jump for joy and excitement.

Thank you so much! We love you - Sophie, Lucy and John

Because Two People Fell in Love...

My oldest sister, Tori, loves the saying - "Because Two People Fell in Love" - so I thought I'd post these pictures just for her and her 40something birthday today.

All because Mom and Dad fell in love we have:
Tori, Roxy, Marci and RJ

And because Tori and Glenn fell in love:
Ashleigh, Griffin, Brooklyn, Ben
And because Roxy and Don fell in love:
Katie, Kyle, Kylie, Charlie, Evie, Jesse, Betsy, Nate
And because Marci and Dave fell in love:
Sophie, Lucy, John
And because RJ and Katie fell in love:
Gabbie, Gavin, Gracie

What a wonderful family - thanks Mom and Dad!

Embarassing Moments

What's your most embarassing moment? I'm sure we can all come up with at least one but there are usually many more in our repertoire. To get the conversation going, I'll share one of mine from about 30 years ago. Here goes...

Motorhomes were the big thing in the late 1970's and early 1980's - my family had one that took us on trips to California and Mexico one year and Washington, DC and Florida the next. Grandma and Grandpa had a mini-version of the motorhome - I loved its quaintness and the cozy feeling I got whenever I was doing dishes in it or just sprawled out reading a book on the cushions. Sometimes when RJ and I were at their house we snuck in so we could pretend we were on our own with a camper - Grandma never liked it much when we did that.

One summer, when I was about 12, they took me, just me, with them on a weekend getaway to Killarney, Manitoba. I packed up my books and my bikini and looked forward to swimming and time with just the two of them. We parked close to the lake and set up the table and chairs in the shade and off I went to the swimming area. There were lots of other pre-teens and teenagers there - and they all seemed to be in big groups. I felt like I was the only person all by myself - and I was a little uncomfortable but not brave enough to go introduce myself to anybody. I just hung out on the beach and then decided to swim out to the floating raft in what seemed like the middle of the lake. I told Grandma I was going to do this and she said, "Are you sure? Be careful." I did my best American Crawl and though I veered off course a few times (as I always do with the crawl) I made it to the raft just fine. Once I hoisted myself up I saw a group of three girls sunning themselves - they were totally self confident and, I could tell at a glance, totally into their looks. Their hair was all wet and slicked back and they had perfect tans - you know the type.

There was a diving board on the raft and I made my way right to it. I dove off the first time, hoisted myself back up on the raft, and then did a flip, followed by more dives. When I got tired I decided to rest on the raft. I picked a spot a few feet away from the girls but I noticed them watching me as I walked over. In fact, I'd noticed them watching me every time I went to the diving board. I thought to myself, "I bet they think I'm pretty good at diving and swimming" and was thrilled when one of them stood up and walked over to me. I thought, "I bet she'll ask me my name and ask me to sit by them." I smiled up at her and she said, "Um, you might want to know that your top is up." My smile froze on my face as I looked down and saw the top piece of my two piece was almost to my collarbone and those breast buds that I was always so careful to hide were bare for the world to see. I muttered, "Thanks." Then I yanked down my top, ran to the diving board and dove in, heading to the beach. I stayed underwater for as long as I could, cheeks burning red and lungs ready to explode. I finally surfaced, grabbed my towel from the chair by Grandma and hung out in the safe refuge of the camper for the rest of the day - mad at myself for being so cocky and too embarassed to go back to the beach since I had no idea who'd seen my bare breasts.

So - what's your story? We'd love to laugh and commiserate with you.

Life Changes

For the past year I've been trying to focus on what really makes us happy - us as in me, Dave, Sophie, Lucy and John. For too many years we sent out Christmas letters describing all the changes in our lives and truly thought it was normal - doesn't everybody get a Ph.D., experience a devastating flood, have a baby, change jobs, buy a lake cabin, and travel around the world in a single year? Or do they?

As our family went from two to five we didn't slow down until finally, last year, Dave and I had a long talk and figured out that things had to, needed to, change. One phrase I'll never forget from that conversation was, "If you're not happy in your job, you need to make some changes that will make you happy." When he told me that, it was freeing - I was happy when I was teaching and when I advised students knowing they knew I actually cared about them and their decisions, but I wasn't happy with the politics of the institution, the grading of papers, the students who didn't take their work seriously yet always expected an "A" in the course. I wasn't happy trying to balance the needs of three children eight and under as well as my husband with the needs of boatloads of undergraduate and graduate students and, finally, my own needs. I think Dave was a little surprised with my decision to quit, but he's been fully supportive and, as he's seen our lives become less stressful, appreciative.

I know this isn't a decision that everyone can afford - either mentally or monetarily - and I, after years of feeling torn between stay-at-home moms and working moms, would never judge another on his/her decision. We all do the best we can - and that is what counts. But please do take some time today and think about what you can do in your life to ensure you're happy - because as my brother-in-law says, "If Mama ain't happy, nobody's happy."

DeSmet, South Dakota - 9 hours of Laura Ingalls Wilder

Our first stop on the Laura Ingalls Wilder tour was to DeSmet - home to Laura and her family in the books On the Shores of Silver Lake and The Long Winter. After lunch at the local DQ, the kids changed into their outfits and we started our guided tour with The Surveyor's House. It was actually owned by the railrooad but the Ingalls family stayed in it each winter, in exchange for keeping careful watch over the railroad tools.

When Laura first saw this house she thought it was the largest house she ever saw - it just goes to show how much we take for granted nowadays. The part they lived in was probably a two-story version of our kitchen and breakfast nook area - on the main floor it included a room that held the stove, a rocking chair, and a table and chairs. Off that room was a pantry the size of a small rectangular walk-in closet, the attic stairway, and Ma and Pa's bedroom they shared with Carrie. The upstairs was one big room the same size as the main floor; that's where Mary and Laura slept. At times Ma rented out sleeping space for men at $0.25 a night (meals were an extra $0.25) and up to 20 men sometimes slept in the main living area. I can't imagine the noise and smell in the house on those nights.

From the Surveyor's House, we walked a few steps to a replica of a one-room school house and then to the real school house which is still being restored after serving as a private home for many years. The kids enjoyed being the teacher and looking for clues about the past on the partially restored chalkboard.

They were so good on the tour - listening so very carfefully to the leader as she told about the house and life on the prairie. In retrospect, we should have got into the car and drove the few blocks to the later home of Charles, Caroline, Mary, Grace and Carrie - they were in such a listening and "taking it all in" mode. Instead, we had them run over to the Discover Laura Center. They loved everything in this place - from the old fashioned stove and food center, to the quill pens and slates, to the old fashioned sewing machine and to the braille station where they made their names out of a braille guide, glue and split peas. Everything was completely hands-on and they were excited. The curator of the museum also came and had them make butter out of cream and a whole lot of shaking. They had a great snack of saltines and hand-shook butter.

The next stop was the Ingalls home I previously mentioned - as the kids were so used to touching everything, this was a little harder. They were, by now, out of listening mode and into exploration. Needless, to say, we didn't stay too long here.

By this time, it was 5 pm and the pageant (play) didn't start until 9 - so we decided to drive around a bit. We ended up at a place we didn't even know about - the Homestead - and stayed there until it closed at 9 pm. This was a huge hit - total exploration and discovery for the kids. They experienced everything from pumping well water, carrying it up the hill, washing clothes, making rope and corn cob dolls (like Laura's Susan), and riding in a covered wagon to a school house for a short lesson. I think they could have stayed there even longer, except they closed at 9.

It'd been a long day so we decided to skip the pageant (after explaining to Evie and Sophie that we already had tickets for Saturday's pageant and there was no way we'd change our minds or miss it) and headed back to the DQ for some supper and ice cream. What a wonderful, but exhausting, day... the next stop on Saturday, Walnut Grove.

Cousins

There's something so very wonderful about seeing our kids playing with their cousins - Sophie, Lucy and John get positively giddy whenever they know we're going to be with cousins. This goes for them all - from Ashleigh, Amy and Katie who are in college down to Gracie and Nate who are three and one. The neat thing is there are so many cousins (24) and the kids have memories of each in their own way - some have stayed with us for a week at a time and there are the "going to bed" and "waking up" with one another memories while others we just plain see more often because of proximity.

Whenever we visit relatives with kids, it's absolutely guaranteed we won't see our children until toward the end of the stay. They give the proper hugs and kisses to aunts and uncles but then immediately grab the hand of one of the cousins and take off outdoors or to the playrooms. As a general rule, there's no fighting and usually, yes just usually, they don't get into trouble. There was that one episode with a disposable camera - when Dave picked up the pictures from developing he was mortified to discover the kids in suggestive poses, and thankful they didn't ask any questions. But, as I said, there usually isn't any trouble.

So, here we are in Brookings, Sourth Dakota - Laura Ingalls Wilder land - with Roxy, Evie, Jesse and Betsy. Roxy made prairie dresses, complete with aprons and bonnets for the girls and I made some knickers (by cutting off Goodwill pants and putting elastic in them) and got shirts, suspenders and straw hats for the boys. We're pretty excited for our four day adventure with Roxy and our cousins. In fact, Sophie summed it all up right before we left Grand Forks to meet up with Roxy and the kids. It'd been hectic getting to the car and there was some bickering. Once we were in the car Sophie said, "Don't worry Mom, we never fight when we're with Evie, Jesse and Betsy." The best thing is - she's right.

Happy Father's Day Dad!

On our recent trip to Dad’s cabin I realized just how much I’m like Dad – there was the being able to fall asleep in two seconds flat, the love for our morning coffee (usually sitting on the deck soaking up our surroundings), the organization (as in the "cabin notebook"), the “do it now” instead of later personality, and the “Curious George” thinking as in always asking questions, whether they’re any of our business or not.

But instead of always being on the go, I like my downtime. That, too, I noticed at the cabin. Whereas I preferred to sit and read a book, Dad was always working on something. One night he yawned his way through supper and went to the loft for a quick nap – his snoring was heard within minutes. But as soon as he woke up (less than 30 minutes later), he was back at it – sanding away on the outside wall of the cabin and applying some kind of varnish to protect it from the elements.
Don’t get me wrong – Dad likes to relax too. But it isn’t the “go play a round of golf” or “head to Happy Hour with friends” type relaxing. It’s more the read a book, look at trade magazines, go out to the shop and fiddle around on a truck (note his "Still Plays with Trucks" sweatshirt), or play Solitaire on the computer. So, even there I guess Dad and I are alike – and that’s a wonderful thing for me. Happy Father’s Day Dad – I love you! Marci

Papa's Cabin

Even though it was at least ten years between visits, the cabin still felt like home. Not the kind of home where there are smells and memories of childhood, but a home where you've seen someone's dream come true.
Dad first saw this beautiful, uninhabited lake and island (known to our family, friends and the pilots as Miller Lake) over 25 years ago; his good friend Terry (along with his youngest child Gretchen) happened upon it during an afternoon hike. My understanding is the group then camped out on the island for the next few years. It was Dad's dream to build a log cabin and this seemed like the place to do it. Even though the project was started 18 years ago and a few summers after that the cabin was "finished," there's always something to do - and Dad can never just sit still. He and Dave got the floating dock back in shape, repaired the second dock, and even built a boat ramp. For the cabin itself, Dad pulled out the sander one night after supper and took care of some worn spots with some sealer.


The inside of the cabin is just beautiful - most of the furniture including the kitchen cabinets, table and benches, bookshelf, coffee tables, and the four poster bed and its bedside tables were homemade. As you can see, from the pictures, one of Sophie's favorite places to read was perched on the ladder up to the loft where she, Lucy and Dad slept.

Last week during our visit a Game & Fish Warden and pilot dropped out of the sky for a surprise visit and Kurt, the warden, asked Dad if he'd ever built a log cabin before. Dad smiled his crooked smile, put his head down a bit and offered, "Well, haven't all little guys? I used to stack one Lincoln Log right up on top of another." Kurt, Hap (the pilot) and Dad all chuckled and Kurt said, "Well you did a mighty good job for your first one." We all agree.

Busy, Busy May

After doing so well for two weeks, I once again took a long hiatus from blogging. I’ll sum everything up here, and then, if you’re interested you can scroll down and take a look at all the pics.
Ballet recitals, end-of-school-year picnics, buying presents for the teachers, wrapping up the art auction by writing ten million thank you notes, Sophie’s 1st communion and confirmation (she and Dave did the readings for it - they were awesome!), attending “same-day” graduation parties of two nephews (one in Willmar, MN and one in Moorhead, MN), Dave traveling to Pennsylvania, Texas, and Fargo, the end of school year itself, helping friends pull up 70’s shag carpet, co-hosting a “Summer’s Here” picnic for the entire neighborhood, forgetting about a dear babysitter's own "baby shower," hosting two bookclubs, and packing up for a six day vacation on a deserted island…whew, those were just a few things that have happened here in the past two weeks.

Unfortunately, none of these events will get the posts they deserve - but at least there'll be a few pics to remember them by.

Happy Mother's Day

Things I love about Mom:

1. Her medical advice: Holding my hand and telling me to point my toes together everytime I had to get a kenalog shot in the butt. She still always has advice for us. A few weeks ago when John hurt his foot I called her up and asked her advice. Later John asked, "Is she really a doctor?"

2. Cooking Eccentricities: The way she pushes her tongue to the corner of her mouth when she beats batter by hand.

3. Writing Eccentricities: She has this thing where right before she actually puts pen to paper she "air writes" it - the pen hovers right above the paper and moves in circles. Tori, Roxy and I joked that if she had to write a research paper she'd write it all out in the air first.

4. Cleaning Advice: White vinegar is still the best "all in one" cleaner around.

5. Washing clothes: As soon as you take the laundry out of the dryer (or off the clothesline), you fold it... no ifs, ands, or buts. And if you're folding towels, you'd better do it the proper way!

6. Her Career Advice: Do what makes you happy.

7. Her sense of organization: Create systems that work for you and your life will be easier. (My friends will all attest this is one thing I'm really good at and I know I learned it all from Mom!)

8. Her obvious caring for Dad: Public displays of affection aren't a bad thing - they're just somewhat embarassing to your children.

9. Her independence: She taught me that I needed to learn how to use a screwdriver, a lawn mower, and a paintbrush. Women don't need men to get things done - it's just that it's often more fun to get things done together.

10. Love: Just because you love someone, it doesn't mean you have to agree with him/her on everything.

Glessner Family Traditions

Growing up, my family was never really big on candy; we were (and still are) definitely more dessert people. Give us a pumpkin pie, apple pie, sheetcake brownies, banana bread, or chocolate chip cookies over M&Ms any day. The Glessner family, on the other hand, is all about candy - no family gathering is ever complete without at least one bowl (usually 2-3) of candy.

The first time Dave and I hosted a family event I purchased all the ingredients for the Thanksgiving dinner: potatoes, butter, cream cheese, corn, fresh cranberries, sugar, pecans, pumpkin, Pillsbury pie crusts, evaporated milk, etc... Dave was in charge of purchasing the pop, beer, and the turkey. I was quite surprised when he came home from shopping with five large bags of M&Ms - three plain and two peanut. It hadn't even occurred to me that with the pumpkin and pecan pies I was making we would also need candy. Apparently I hadn't been paying very much attention to Glessner holiday gatherings - there was always candy around. The thing is - you can't take the dessert out of the girl so I still insist on making pies for the family events, only now I've learned no matter how big the gathering is, I only need to make one pie.

So tomorrow when we go to Fargo for Amy's college graduation party I'm sure there will be lots of bowls of candy spread around the house. And next week, when we host everyone for Sophie's first communion I'll make sure to include M&Ms on my grocery list. It's taken me almost 20 years, but I am learning.

Shortlived Household Organization

In the weeks before my surgery I went on a crazy organizing kick - similar to that of the nesting instinct they talk about with pregnant women. The bathrooms were all stocked with plenty of toilet paper and clean towels, the beds all got clean linens, the laundry, instead of being a heap on the floor, was all clean, folded and put away, and the kids had clothes laid out for the upcoming week. The fridge and pantry were well stocked and I even cleaned the kitchen junk drawer, organized the laundry room and got the kids' toy room in tip-tip shape. You get the idea...

I can tell it's been a week since then - yesterday John wore two mismatched (as in one blue camoflauge and one white) socks to daycare while Sophie wore a fleece pullover she's been wearing for the past six years and Lucy wore her Sunday dress to school. On more than one occassion I've been thankful I had the foresight to put toilet paper in the bathrooms as the roll has run out in the middle of a job. And I've given up venturing into Sophie's room with my crutches for her good-night kiss - it's just way too much of a mess to navigate. (The pictures can attest to the mess.)

So, tonight's the night - cleaning time for this family. I'll bark orders from the couch while they get busy stacking and putting away papers, toys and water glasses. I'll probably hear it from the peanut gallery, but hey, a clean house and a good night kiss should be worth it for all of us.

Uncouth Behavior

Don’t tell my mom this, but this morning I went to the YMCA in my pajamas. I have all kinds of excuses for this unbelievable behavior and none of them actually fit into the “lazy” category. BUT, if you were one of the few people who saw me at 7:15 this morning walking through the Y doors and into the women’s locker room, I do apologize. If you then saw me as I left the locker room and walked to my car an hour or so later, I also apologize to you. But to the six sleeping kids on the second and third floors of our house, I accept your thanks for letting you sleep in.

House of a Different Kind

I know the Christmas season is past, but I still wanted to show off these gingerbread houses the kids made with the Shorma cousins on Thanksgiving. Kylie was awesome at putting together the frames (Roxy and I, after trying one or two ourselves, quickly delegated that chore to her.) and guiding the process. I’m not sure what they thought was more fun – the decorating or the eating of the candy. Even last week, when the rooftops and red hot paths were covered in a fine layer of construction dust, the kids were asking when they could eat the houses. I told them for the umpteenth time they were not for eating, just for decorating and then, in a total act of cowardice, placed them in the trash while all the kids were at school. What would you have done?

Happy Birthday Lucy!

At 5 pm this afternoon Lucy called out, “I’m exactly 7 – hey everyone, I’m exactly 7 now!” Her enthusiasm, and that shown by her sister and brother, have been so uplifting today. It started at 6:30 with Sophie waking up John and then both of them headed downstairs to whip up some chocolate chip muffins for Lu. They picked the two biggest muffins of all and placed them on her special birthday plate (made in AZ over Christmas) and popped in two candles. Orange juice was poured and then Sophie came back upstairs to get me and see if she could wake up Lucy. As we playfully argued back and forth over who should get to wake her up, me or Sophie, we heard giggles at the bottom of the stairs – there was Lucy lapping it up. After the appropriate hugging and kissing and birthday wishes we all headed back downstairs to eat some muffins. The party continued afterschool with homemade pizza and birthday cake. One party down, one to go as she’ll celebrate with her friends and a sledding party on Saturday – hope for some snow and moderate temps for us!

7 Things to Know About Lucy

1. Her dimple on her right cheek is always there to see.
2. Uncle Mark gave her the name “Pinball” after a trip to San Diego in December, 2005. Apparently she totally resembled a pinball caught in a machine.
3. Her first name for Sophie was “Opie.”
4. When she was two, we made up stories in the car as we drove home from daycare. They usually started with “Once there was a girl named _____. She lived in _______. and then Sophie and Lucy filled in all the blanks. Lucy has been a storyteller ever since; we used to lay in the bottom bunk of the bunk bed and she’d tell me story after story.
5. The first book Lucy “published” was called “My School.”
6. Most Saturday mornings you can find Lucy and John playing with the Playmobil pirates and knights. They then get into character by dressing up as pirates.
7. Her legs are so long that when she runs she looks like a gazelle.

Bedhead

I’ve always been known to have bedhead – it doesn’t matter if I have long hair, medium length hair or super short spiky hair, bedhead has always been a part of who I am. Usually it doesn’t matter because it’s only family members who see my head for what it really is – a full smattering of cowlicks and white scalp beneath the black hair. Occasionally others gather a glimpse – the mail carrier, the flower delivery boy, another parent dropping her kids off at school, or a neighbor stopping by for coffee. Whenever this happens I immediately think of my mother. She was infamous for freaking out if the doorbell rang and she was dressed in garden gear or hadn’t combed her hair. She’d look at one of us four kids, all equally as disheveled as her, and yell at one of us to answer the door while she went upstairs to get cleaned up. It was then up to us to keep the doorbell ringer occupied for the next 5-10 minutes until Mom showed up in a perfectly pressed chambray shirt with the sleeves casually rolled up and hair and teeth freshly brushed. Whenever our bell rings before I’m properly attired, I panic, wondering who it is that might see me in this state or if there’s any way I can slink away to an upstairs window, unnoticed. About that time one of the kids throws open the door and welcomes the door ringer into our house. No escape for me, at least not this time.

Wrinkly Carrots

Just when I have begun to have confidence in myself as a cook, things go wrong. Years ago Theresa provided me with a fail-proof recipe that tastes wonderful. It’s basically a 4-5 pound roaster chicken stuffed with 8-10 garlic cloves and a wedged lemon and baked for a few hours. With an hour left of cooking time, I add cut up potatoes and carrots and while the chicken is cooling enough to cut, I make gravy out of the drippings. It’s one of those meals that’s perfect for impressing friends and relatives… but not so Wednesday night. We wanted to eat by 5 pm so we could spend the rest of the evening attending Las Noches de las Luminarias at the Desert Botanical Garden in Phoenix.

In preparation, I preheated the oven and stuffed the chicken by 2:15 and then went off to read a book. At 3:30 I put the vegetables in a different roasting pan and went back to my reading. At about 4:45 Bev alerted me that all was not well… that the chicken, in fact, was quite raw. It was then we all (by now it was quite the family affair) figured out it should have been cooked at 325 degrees rather than the 250 that I had set the oven. We turned up the heat, cooked the potatoes and carrots and the microwave, and waited to eat until 6. So much for an easy-to-prepare, delicious dinner.

Throughout dinner Bev exclaimed over and over again how wonderful the meal was, Sophie said her carrots tasted wrinkly, and I wanted to sink in my seat. Next time I think I’ll follow the recipe.

Over the hills and through the woods to Grandmother's house we go...

“Through the door and down the stairs, by the pool and across the parking lot, over the rocks and down the sidewalk, to Grandmother’s house we go”

When we visit Grandma Bev and Grandpa James in Arizona we stay at the “guest” condo a few blocks away from their house. Two years ago when we last visited at Christmastime we made up the above verse to the popular tune. Sophie and Lucy immediately memorized it and it helped give them landmarks to find their way. They still sing it whenever we head to Grandma and Grandpa’s and last year they taught it to John. Yesterday morning it was wonderful to hear him say, “Let’s do the Grandma thing!” and hear a chorus of “Through the door and down the stairs, by the pool…”

Christmas in Arizona

After 30 hours of straight through driving, we made it to Arizona by 10:30 Saturday night. I’m proud to say I accomplished 1/10 of the driving and 9/10 of the supervision. The kids did a fantastic job thanks to a lot of drawing paper, a new Playmobil Santa and his sleigh, and movies. Barnyard, a recommendation from Sophie’s 3rd grade teacher, was most definitely the biggest movie hit. The treats from Bridget and JR (Thank you, thank you, thank you!) helped provide a sugar high when the driving got to be too much. Grandpa James and Grandma Bev helped finish polishing them off and now we’re all looking for the recipe for the brownie cupcakes with the cream filling (hint, hint). We’re enjoying our time here – watching the Santa bikers, swimming, hottubbing, and drinking mighty strong coffee. We hope this finds you taking some time for yourself too.