When did we become a society that is so egocentric? I know it’s been coming for a long time but it just seems like we keep finding new ways to go over the top. The latest for me is spring school portraits. Last year was the first time our school offered them – and my kids were crushed that I didn’t order any pictures. Well guess what – it’s that time of year again. Yesterday Lucy came home with a sheet of paper announcing that Spring Portraits were coming – it was time for parents to schedule haircuts for their kids and pick out outfits. When I told the kids we wouldn’t order any, one of them got very upset and said, “These are the best pictures ever – you get to sit on rocks and pose.” Another went on to say that all the other kids would get them. Well, I know for a fact that a lot of kids at their school won't get them - because they're too busy worrying about putting food on the table to buy pictures. I didn't say that, but I did lecture them. I said that their dad and I choose to spend our money on other things that we feel are more important - like spending time in Arizona with grandparents or going hiking in Colorado. Or on books. Then I added, "We buy the pictures in the fall but we don't need to be so frivolous and buy the pictures again in the spring."
Then I really went off on the whole, "When we were young..." and told them about the one time I got to have a real portrait taken - when I was a senior in high school and I got to pick out two outfits - one for the formal pose and one for the informal pose - and went with a photographer into real-live woods and had my picture taken. I pointed out that happened once and it was a huge deal and that I really don't think we need to have our pictures posing in front of rocks - real or fake - any more than that.
But now I'm thinking - even though I argue for the craziness of spring portraits - don't I still value pictures of the kids? Each year between October and December aren't you likely to find me shopping for matching outfits for the kids and making arrangements for our Christmas card photos? Don't we, each year on the first Sedona hike, stop at the "picture rock" (as John named it) and take a picture of the kids? Finally, just look at this blog - it's all about the kids and their activities and the way they make me laugh... or scream. So, really, how egocentric am I?
Maybe the difference is I value the pictures of them engaged in activity - like cooking or drawing or hiking or reading. But then again, maybe I'm just justifying my own actions.
The other possibility of why I'm so irked is that this is a school-sanctioned event. It may even be a fundraiser for PTO - I can't say for sure because I've been an on again/off again PTO parent this year. But really, there are far more exciting things for Lucy to be sharing with me than the announcement of Spring Portraits. In her backpack, along with the portrait flyer, was a telescope she made out of a cardboard tube that showed various constellations. We oohed and aahed over that. Also in her backpack was her newest library book - a new Magic TreeHouse book she was anxious to read aloud to John. (The day before she and John snuggled on the couch and she read to him for a whole hour.) So, my point is: shouldn't we, as parents, be spending our time with our kids reading or talking or doing homework vs. prepping them for their portrait session? I certainly think so.
Thanks for listening.
Yes, yes, yes! I agree! Besides...you can always set them on a rock at University Park and take great pictures of them by yourself, if you wanted to (that's what I did, anyway!)... ;-)
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